Carrick ‘snaps’ but comforted by £50m MLS development as ‘well-placed sources’ make shock discovery

Michael Carrick flew off the handle after Man Utd lost to Hull and Arsenal were never going to be able to keep Myles Lewis-Skelly after that.

Premier League football is back and Mediawatch couldn’t be happier.

Alexander Isak was destined to make the headlines on the opening weekend after that crafty little fixture computer lined up his return to Newcastle.

No issues with that: another poor performance, especially in the context of the Magpies playing well, made for an easy enough narrative, the sort that Newcastle’s Chronicle can, will and should latch onto.

But there is an inevitable danger of steering into non-story territory, as with this:

There is at least no mystique here; Lee Ryder reveals precisely ‘what Alexander Isak did after Newcastle United were denied at the death vs Liverpool’ within his opening paragraph.

And this, dear reader, is the noteworthy, shocking thing Alexander Isak did after Newcastle United were denied at the death vs Liverpool:

The incident was so astonishing that Ryder does not refer to it again at any other point.

Who was Isak winking at? Was it definitely a wink or did some Geordie fume just get in his eye? Should Ryder be frustrated at having filed an 800-word match report so apparently uninteresting that the headline writer couldn’t be bothered to read beyond the first line after realising they could just pretend something controversial had happened?

Alexander the bait The problem being that other websites in the Reach stable will soon see such an article doing well and Chinese whisper it beyond what was already a point of remarkable tenuousness.

For example, the Daily Mirror website‘s take, published three or so hours later:

Note that Isak’s dastardly wink was now aimed directly at Newcastle fans, despite Ryder never stating as such.

And suddenly, one journalist’s throwaway line props up two separate non-stories on the definite slow news day that is *checks notes* the first Monday of the new Premier League season. Sure.

Taking the Michael The alternative, mind you, is to pretend that Michael Carrick absolutely laid into Jan Aage Fjortoft after Manchester United lost to Hull City.

That is more than good enough for this lot:

‘Michael Carrick snaps ‘that’s ridiculous’ and gives reporter death stare in tense interview after Man Utd’s loss to Hull’ – The Sun website.

”Oh that’s ridiculous!’ – Michael Carrick snaps back at Man United accusation after Hull defeat’ – Manchester Evening News.

”That is ridiculous’ – Michael Carrick furiously hits back at Manchester United passion claims after Hull defeat’ – Goal.com.

‘Michael Carrick snaps at reporter for ‘ridiculous’ Man Utd question after Hull defeat’ – Daily Mirror website.

The clue that you are being really quite silly should come when you follow the same line – ‘Michael Carrick rages at ‘ridiculous’ question from reporter after dreadful Man Utd defeat to Hull’- as GB News, guys.

But this potent combination of headline and standfirst underlines why the MailOnline is among the elite when it comes to the fine art of sensationalism:

For those who might not have Carrick cracking, snapping and presumably popping, behold this X-rated footage but please do be warned: it isn’t pretty.

Not nice to see a normally mild-mannered individual fly off the handle like that. Carrick’s tone of voice even almost changed, such was his uncontrollable fury.

Six of the best Perhaps it will uncrack Carrick to learn that, according to the Daily Express website, ‘Man Utd can complete six transfers this week in response to Hull embarrassment’.

This has certainly emerged as the headline template of choice in the summer of 2026, but it does fall down somewhat when you find yourself suggesting that Manchester United might sign Leicester teenager Louis Page while offloading Joshua Zirkzee, Harry Amass and Toby Collyer ‘in response to’ losing at Hull.

Myles sigh club Myles Lewis-Skelly is not among those six Manchester United transfers which will definitely be completed after this weekend’s defeat, but Samuel Luckhurst sets the record straight in The Sun:

Fair enough. Seems unlikely given he has started both Arsenal games this season and played 90 minutes in the Champions League final three months ago, but if Carrick loses his cool as above he can be very convincing.

So why are Manchester United still so confident this obviously undoable deal can still be done?

‘Well-placed sources’ have discovered ‘rotation’.

Definitely sounds like a player Arsenal can persuaded to sell.

Settle in well at Carrington, Myles. Arsenal have had their arms twisted. Sorry, fella.